Sum Sum Sum(mer) Time

Get excited. The numbers are in for August.


2 Birds
Kathy and Eleanore survived the heat of the summer beautifully.

0 Traumatic Experiences
...Which is really good considering the quantity and proximity of natural disasters recently.

46 or 49 eggs for the month
Some days I am really good at remembering to make the tally mark, some days I am not.

Free for Interpretation

Vegetarian Fed Hens.

Do you think that was on the job application at the egg plant?

Circle the adjective that best describes you:
herbivore
omnivore*
carnivore*

*Eating meet does not immediately disqualify you from this position...


This happens from time to time. I see a phrase and understand exactly what it means, what the intentions are, and then... for fun I see if I can give it another meaning.

For example, the stool that resides in the tool room at work that is labeled "shop." I suppose its main purpose is to convey "Hey, don't take this stool out of here, this is where it belongs." But sometimes when I pass by, maybe that seating option is telling me to "go ahead, get yourself something nice."  And that garbage can with the name Skip on the side of it? Maybe that is name of someone on the cleaning crew, or maybe, just maybe, it is encouraging people to travel with a little more spring in their step.


Never a dull moment in this noggin!

The 1.00 Acre Wood

(Not to be confused with the 100 Acre Wood.)

I was looking at a property map of home sweet home today at KGIS and realized that of our 1 acre, I have probably only tread on half of it.  Since our lot is long and narrow, there is quite a bit of unexplored territory beyond the coop. "Quite a bit" as in, the other half acre.

Charlie may not have even been into the depths of the woods. When he chases rabbits he usually stops short of the tree line, puffs out his chest, raises his head, and then returns to the house with his tail high and his tongue dragging.
 

A friend at work has been talking a lot lately about going ginseng digging. I don't think the terrain in our neck of the woods is quite right for prolific ginseng growth, but it won't hurt to look. I just hope I don't find any snakes. Or better yet, they don't find me.
 

Lost in Translation

Yesterday I decided to type for a while the way I hear some people speak on a regular basis. Sometimes I admire the casualness of the dialect, other times I want to - well, other times it can irritate the bajeebers out of me. (My bajeebers are much better off left alone and unprovoked.)

This past weekend somebody chuckled at my use of the word sneakers. Sneakers. Up until 6th grade, I knew no other term for that particular style of shoe. When my family moved south and I started at a new school I was really worried that I wouldn't be allowed in the gym. Tennis Shoes Only.

I pictured the white adidas shoe with the green tab at the back of the heel that I had seen my uncle wear.

I probably told my mom about my concerns and that we needed to go shopping. She helped me understand.

Occasionally I pick up a new term or phrase that I have never heard before and if it is one that I like, try to incorporate it into my daily conversations. Most of the time I fail miserably and it comes out akward and forced. But it usually gives me something to laugh about.

Eats bin a wall...

Ah fill lock Ah ain't had much in the way of sayin bout chickens these days. Ah reckon cause not too much bin goin own.  Ah feed in water 'em same as usual. Day bin layin eggs same as usual. Poopin' too.

What?

I have noticed recently that Eleanore is the first one into the coop and up to either the feeder or the water basin when I am there visiting and refilling. The other day she pecked at my ring as I put the basin of fresh water back in. (I guess she was a little thirsty for some clean, hay free water.) Kathy is always close but never between me and Eleanore.

This past weekend I fed and watered the ladies early on Saturday a.m. Sunday afternoon when we got back in town I got to witness the Hungry March - two hens frantically patrolling the fenced perimeter occasionally pecking into the dirt. Honestly, it made me feel a little guilty that I didn't top off the feeder, but it was entertaining. I'll have to try and get it on video.

Lucy in Disguise

Last week I reported that a friend found out that one her hens was actually a rooster. She has since found out that 2 of her hens are roosters. Little Gerri now Little Jerry.

If Lucy maintains her feminine status I have a feeling she will be one busy bird. Then again, if she is really a Lucas there could be other issues. For instance - no eggs. How dissapointing.

An admission

Admitting you have a problem is the first step.

See where the grass meets denim... yeah, up there, at my knees, that is my problem. That is how tall the grass in the "garden" is. 

Ah hem. Was.

And, save for these babies:

 the garden has been returned to yard.

Up until last night I was convinced these plants were carrots. Makes sense... that is what I planted there. The thing is, the foliage just doesn't look like carrots. Can anybody help me out? What are those seed pods?

Its all about the Ears (i.e. I'm a nerd)

I had a conversation with a person the other day that has an allergy to white shelled eggs, but not brown. From what little I think I know about chickens and eggs, the only difference between white eggs and brown is the shell color. I was intrigued, so I did a little "research".

White eggs often come from hens with white ear lobes.

Brown eggs often come from hens with red ear lobes - like Kathy and Eleanore.

The beautiful blue eggs come from Araucana hens. (Must be to make up for the butter face - "That's a good looking hen, but her face...")

After gathering some information I have formed this hypothesis:

The white eggs this person has consumed have mostly been from the grocery store.

The brown eggs this person has consumed have mostly been from free range or backyard chickens.

Backyard birds, often red ear-lobed, have a different diet than white ear-lobed factory (battery) hens, therefore - WAIT FOR IT - the allergy originates with the chicken feed!

Gender Issues



When I first got my pullets and they weren't laying any eggs, a lot of people suggested that maybe I had roosters. As we know now this was not the case. My toddler-aged chicks have grown up nicely into hens.

A friend of mine was not so lucky. Mrs. Utz (the mother of my best high school friend, Sarah) started with three chicks; Patty, Little Gerri and Lucy, only to find out that Patty is really a Patrick.

I decided to do a little research on gender assignment of young poultry. I use the term research loosely. Maybe 'Google search for instant gratification of curiosity' fits better. Anyway, I came across this table which answers another question I had about the term sex links. It is kind of obvious now.

Inside Outside Upside Down

Inside the workplace it is very cold. Or at least, I get very cold. My hands have got to be 20 degrees cooler than say, my neck. Cold fingers make intricate work more difficult. I wear a sweatshirt everyday and have been debating the addition of a scarf, gloves and maybe something to warm my nose.

Outside it is very hot. It is very, very hot in my car. My AC doesn't work anymore. Stopping is my greatest enemy when I am on the road.

This really didn't have anything to do with anything else. Just felt like sharing.

Oh, and by the way, so far the egg laying rate for August is 1 a day.  I'm hypothesizing the 50% decrease  has something to do with the heat.

A Poem.

(Not Charlie, just looks a little like him.)

Swimming

Swimming

In my swimming pool

When days are hot

When days are cool

In my swimming pool

Backstroke

Sidestroke

Fancy Diving Too!

Oh, Wouldn't you like to swim with me

in my swimming pool?

-unknown

It's a slow news day from the mini-farm. Really, a slow news week. Ever since the coop has been re-enforced there isn't that much excitement surrounding escapees or intruders. With the exception of those dang moths that are like scaled down stealth bombers, of course.

True or False

I realized the other day that I never posted the numbers for June or July. Well, I suppose I wouldn't be too late for July... however, I didn't keep track either month. You may not miss it, but I kind of like seeing the data over time. 

I have two excuses:

1. Summer vacation - no reading, writing, or arithmetic
2. I was overwhelmed with Squash!

Never said they were good excuses. So here is an alternative format for my monthly summary:

True or False

Hot - T

2 Hens - T

Eggs Collected - T

Traumatic Experiences - F

Kathy & Eleanore had successful budget talks - F

Fryday

Man, it's hot out there!

Extreme weather makes me aware of just how much I reeeaaally like "farming".
The hen house isn't all that far away from the people house...

...But, when it was cold and the weather was precipitous, tromping through the morning frost to break up a gallon of ice wasn't at the top of my list. 

...And now, with the high humidity and the mosquitoes thriving, I find myself grateful for city ordinances preventing me from bringing home a goat or sheep.

I still maintain that I would like to live on a farm. I'm just not so sure about the working there too.

Me and Julio Down by the Schoolyard

Actually it was Charlie and me down on the greenway.

Yesterday morning I promised Charlie that we would go to the park after I got home from work. At the sounds of GO, PARK, and WORK his ears perked and his head tilted. (Work sounds a lot like walk when you are a spoiled dog.) He was ready and wasn't going to let me get out the door without breaking my heart or making me feel guilty about making him wait.

I held true to my words and after work we went to the park.

There weren't many dogs out last night. I saw maybe 4 or 5. There were quite a lot of people, most with some involvement with football practice, but also many out walking, jogging and riding bikes.

Charlie and I made our way through the greenway giving wide enough birth to other pedestrians.

We ended up playing "leap frog" with one couple - when we weren't stopped to sniff, we were covering more ground. Anytime we got near, the lady would grab her companion and drag him in between herself and my happy, tongue and tail wagging dog. The man gave me the stink eye.

Have you every seen a truly vicious dog out for a walk at the park? I am sympathetic to those who have had bad experiences with dogs - or any animals for that matter. (I was once bitten by a turkey.) But have a little faith in those who take their furry family members out in public. 



Seriously. Look at this face.



93 days

I came accross an article a little while ago where a Michigan woman was facing up to 93 days in jail for growing a vegetable garden in her front yard.



http://www.channel4.com/

So... vegetales can be bad for you. Especially if, say, you ignore your town/city ordinances and the first communications requesting you relocate your produce.

Cohabitants

Kathy and Eleanore are gracefully sharing their sweet hen house with a few other winged creatures.

Black Ninja Darting Moths.

I have a feeling that is not what they are regarded as in scientific-flying-insect circles. Although... I might just circulate a petition.

Forgetfulness

It has its perks...

...Such as this gladiola. Or these gladiolus? I'm not sure how many are there. I don't remember planting them and I'm pretty certain they weren't there last year. But I'm happy its there now.

Also, every once in a while, I will have a conversation with someone who reads my blog. I tend to forget that I have an audience and am immediately suspicious that they are stalking my chickens... and then I remember I wrote about it and shared it publicly.

 

Eleanore

(That's not really true. I know if anybody is stalking my birds, it's a critter that wants to eat them. But I have been caught off guard a time or two - What? How did you kn...Ohhhhhh right.)

Twist and Shout

I picked my first cucumber the other day. I used the same method I use when picking zucchini or squash: grab the veggie and twist up near the stem of the plant. Sometimes I come accross a pricker, but they are nothing compared to what is on a cucumber before it is ripe.

Hence, the shout!

Good News

"Good news!" I told Aaron after returning from the coop to find Kathy and Eleanore unharmed, "the gun turret won't be necessary."

After I told Aaron about waking up in the middle of the night to the sounds of predators making a ruckus, he suggested adding a gun turret to the impenetrable fortress.

It was one of those times where I was not sure if I woke up because I heard the noise or if I heard the noise because I woke up. Either way, it didn't sound like dogs and I was worried for my flock. (if you can call two chickens a flock).

So I am happy to report all is well on the mini-farm.

Humbled

I was having a fat day Saturday. If you are male, you may not have experienced this. However, if there is a lady in your life, you've probably been around it. If you are female and you don't know what I am talking about - lucky you is the nicest thing I can say.

I started my day in Lycra and spandex - not really materials that make me feel my best. (My sister-in-law and I were going for a swim and then a bike ride.) I was grumpy leaving the house and kept tugging at my top which would ride up over my hip fat and reveal the pudge.

After my shower I put on a shirt that I swear didn't use to fit like that. Amazingly, I didn't tear it off and throw it across the room. I did some house work - probably complaining to myself about how I hate doing dishes and wondering how long those leftovers had been in the fridge...

Later in the afternoon my mom and I went out and about and stopped for a light dinner at a fast food restaurant. I know what you are thinking. "You're having a fat day and you went to fast food? No wonder!" (We had salads thank you very much.)

While we were there an older couple walked in with winter coats on. They both had gray hair and seemed frail. They sat in a booth next to us just going on about their day. I tried to see what they had ordered without really staring. It didn't look like much.

I went up the counter and asked the cashier if they came in often. She said they did. "Do you think they are homeless?" She said she thought so, but that they drove a car. I asked if they sold gift cards and stopped whining about my ill-fitting exercise-wear and the chores to keep up my air conditioned home.